Sunday, June 10, 2007

Why Do Parents Love to Compare Their Children?

I hate it when other parents compare their children with mine. I mean... No matter what you say, to me, Aza and Chika are the most beautiful and perfect children in this whole world. I'm quite sure other parents feel the same way about their kids. But why the comparison, why the gloating upon finding out that their kids seem to excel more than mine?

I once chatted with an acquaintance who delighted in telling me that her son could lie flat on his tummy by himself when he was two months' old. She asked how Chika was doing. And even though I could not see her face, I bet she smirked gleefully, knowing that Chika could not do that yet.

So what? I felt like screaming. It didn't mean that your son would be another Einstein or something! And even if one day he would, why should I care?

Another acquaintance told me proudly that her daughter could read when she was two years old. Then she added, "Ah, but your son can't read yet, can he? And he's almost three..."

Mind your own business, Ma'am! Ohkay, I get it, maybe your life is SO miserable that you have to take delight in mundane, trivial things such as these. But still... find other victims, okay? Anyone... anything, will do. Just stay away from my life.

The thing is, I believe, every parent wants the best for her child(ren). Every child is unique. What works for one might not work for another. You use flash cards to teach your children to read? Fine. It's your choice. My partner and I do not like to use flash cards for some reasons. Just respect our choice, would you?

Even if your precious one can read in the age of one, it doesn't necessarily mean he'd be smarter than his peers in the future. Ohkay, so he can walk before his first birthday. Will he be a strong athlete or something in the future? Who can tell?

I know, comparing kids (and other wordly goods or whatever) is a natural thing to do. I guess most of us do that, albeit secretly. Let's keep it that way. You can say, your buddy's kid is hideous, disgraceful, mannerless, etc. to your partner, for instance. Just make sure to refrain yourself from blurting it out loud in public.


si kiky said...

Gosh! I'm sooooo agree with you!!!!!!
anyway, I had another story,...I never well...rarely bought my babies fancy stuff especially on their birthday! they don't even understand what is a birthday party and gifts anyway..
one day, a friend of mine said to me
"Kasihan deh anak loe, ultah ke tiga ngga dibeliin apa2x ama mak nya"
Ow really???
Suddenly,I have all 10 thumbs when doing the baking and cooking but I made my daughter her birthday cake (mind the look, but it tasted good hehehhe)
And yeah, I wite blog for them,,,
So I told her " Really, is that so? did you write blog and stuffs for your babies to tell the world how special they are for you? "

Primadonna Angela said...

tiap ortu kan nunjukkin rasa sayangnya dengan beragam cara. ada yang ngerayain ultah.. ada yang kasi hadiah.. ada yang bikin blog.. ada yang sering diajak jalan bareng..

jadi menurutku, biarlah tiap orang sayang dengan caranya masing2. asal jangan seenaknya nuduh atau ngecap "kasian sih anak lu.." lagian apa urusan dia, cobaaa? hihi.

thanks for sharing!


Uh, aku janji nggak bakal mau banding-bandingin dan adu balap ;p

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