Sunday, June 10, 2007
Why Do Parents Love to Compare Their Children?
I hate it when other parents compare their children with mine. I mean... No matter what you say, to me, Aza and Chika are the most beautiful and perfect children in this whole world. I'm quite sure other parents feel the same way about their kids. But why the comparison, why the gloating upon finding out that their kids seem to excel more than mine?
I once chatted with an acquaintance who delighted in telling me that her son could lie flat on his tummy by himself when he was two months' old. She asked how Chika was doing. And even though I could not see her face, I bet she smirked gleefully, knowing that Chika could not do that yet.
So what? I felt like screaming. It didn't mean that your son would be another Einstein or something! And even if one day he would, why should I care?
Another acquaintance told me proudly that her daughter could read when she was two years old. Then she added, "Ah, but your son can't read yet, can he? And he's almost three..."
Mind your own business, Ma'am! Ohkay, I get it, maybe your life is SO miserable that you have to take delight in mundane, trivial things such as these. But still... find other victims, okay? Anyone... anything, will do. Just stay away from my life.
The thing is, I believe, every parent wants the best for her child(ren). Every child is unique. What works for one might not work for another. You use flash cards to teach your children to read? Fine. It's your choice. My partner and I do not like to use flash cards for some reasons. Just respect our choice, would you?
Even if your precious one can read in the age of one, it doesn't necessarily mean he'd be smarter than his peers in the future. Ohkay, so he can walk before his first birthday. Will he be a strong athlete or something in the future? Who can tell?
I know, comparing kids (and other wordly goods or whatever) is a natural thing to do. I guess most of us do that, albeit secretly. Let's keep it that way. You can say, your buddy's kid is hideous, disgraceful, mannerless, etc. to your partner, for instance. Just make sure to refrain yourself from blurting it out loud in public.