Thursday, January 11, 2007

It Took Me Thirty Years...

...to finally realize that there is no shortcut to evade disappointment and hurt. There are phases that one has to pass before she can accept the negative emotion(s). All these years I have wallowed in denial and self-pity. And the hurt lingered for a long, long time.

Something disappointed me today. Instead of denying the feelings I felt, saying, "This doesn't bother me, not at all! I'm a tough one!" like usual, I decided to embrace everything. I explored how miserable I felt. I acknowledged the hurt, the pain. I allowed myself to grieve and be angry for a while. I let myself be discouraged.

A few minutes later, poof. The resenments and everything were gone. I felt refreshed and blessed. I had grieved, yes, but I also had accepted the pain.

I am a mere human. I have embraced that notion.

Took me so long to realize that there are steps to accept my negativities. Hope others don't have to wait that long.


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